Looking back, I came to realize that I spent quite a high amount of my precious time and ENERGY trying – trying to be perfect, be appreciated, and liked by everyone.
This was one of my biggest challenges at work, whether I was saying yes to tasks that were not part of my job or tolerating and entertaining difficult people’s requests. One day, I decided to speak up for myself and damn not care about what other people will think and say – AND THERE BEHOLD, I never felt so alive and free in my entire life HAHAHAHA (well kidding aside… )
If you are like me, who feels like wearing a mask when among people, I want you to know it is okay to be you. Your perfect imperfections make you special and unique.
Be your own kind of beauty. Stay true to your feelings, opinions, thoughts, and emotions. Live your own life, with no apologies and no regrets. Seeking validation from others will do us no good. We can’t control what other people feel or think, but we are in charge of our own actions, feelings, and thoughts.
What other people think of you does not define you. What they see in you is their opinion. Some may perceive you as smart, funny, and talented. Others may think you’re an average or even a lousy person. To some, you may look pretty. To others, you may not. It’s all about their standards and it has nothing to do with you.
I’m far from perfection (we all are) but I do the best I know and the best I can every day. It is very important to always talk yourself up. You must have that strong foundation of self-worth. It took years of practice for me to love and approve of myself as I am today. I had to learn how to say no to things I didn’t really want to do, without feeling selfish, guilty, or overly worried that I might hurt or upset anyone. We must teach people how to treat us by deciding what we will and won’t accept. I ceased letting anyone take advantage of me. I am not a doormat. It is not my responsibility to entertain other people and make them happy.
Always remember that you’re in charge of your life. Don’t depend your happiness to others. Yes, I admit, I do enjoy it when people compliment me, but I am not dependent on them to feel good about myself. It is not your parents’, your boss, or your bf’s responsibility to make you feel valued, cherished, loved, whole, etc., It is your life. It is yours.
Today, I spend my precious time only with people who bring out the best in me, who support me and accept me just the way I am. It may be just 2-3 people out of those 3000 followers you have in FB, IG, Twitter etc. As long as you feel at peace when they are around, that’s enough.
Make yourself the priority. Engage in activities that will bring you joy. This way, you will create happiness from the inside instead of chasing it through other people. Once you decided to embrace yourself with love and compassion, being alone doesn’t feel scary anymore. You will eventually get used to enjoying your own company.
Just think from this perspective: Out of everyone you know in the world, the only person that is always present in your life, day in and day out, is you. When we have a harmonious relationship with ourselves, we no longer look to other people to fill holes in our self-esteem.
Know you are worthy and beautiful, not because others think so, but because you KNOW in your heart, it is true.